Thursday, May 8, 2014

My Ode to Coffee

There's this magical little potion that I like to have in the mornings. It's my salvation. Although venomous as it is, it brings forth life. You know it as COFFEE! 

You know when Mario comes across a Star in the game and he becomes invincible? Yeah, the coffee is my star and I become invincible...for a limited time of course. It gives me that boost I need to take on the world and whatever it decides to throw at me. Yet there are things that even coffee can't handle. The barrage of aggravating questions and comments from fellow coworkers, the importance placed on futile assignments, and the madness of corporate hierarchy. Even magic can't handle that what chance does coffee have? 

Still, for a moment in time, short as may be, coffee solves all of my problems. I have something to look forward to every morning thanks to this black, teeth-staining liquid. #coffee 

Power up! 

Monday, May 5, 2014

Mimosas are a gateway alcoholic drink

So guess who ended up doing brunch, going to the beach, hitting up Palace and Twist? Me! The end. There I just told you what I did. For details, please keep reading. 

When did unlimited mimosas become so expensive? $30 per person? Only the richest kings of Europe can afford that. Since I forked over $30, I might as well drink my worth. And I did, and more. And that is how it all started at Oak Tavern with three of my friends. After all that alcohol I thought to my self "I should TRY and sober up with some coffee." And tried we did. But alas, there is no elixir out there to magically undo all that happiness that alcohol brings. 

The drinks did their number on me alright! There was no fighting what was coming! Though the rest is a bit of a blur, I'll just list the important things that happened:

  • Had some more drinks at Twist. Twist is a lot like that cantina in Star Wars. No exaggeration at all. 
  • Met up with more people. More witnesses to my debauchery
  • I was at Palace for about 15 minutes which felt like 3 hours in drunk time. 
  • Ended up at some bar in a hotel on 9th Street and Washington. Where I met three fine young men in which I asked if they were tops, bottoms, or versatile. Apparently it's not a very polite question to ask.
And there you go. A quick rundown of my evening. And here I am now, recovering. 

It was all a blur, literally. 



Sunday, May 4, 2014

Self Revelation and the Beach!

I know I can be a little possessive but it's a charming quality of mine, I swear it! Anyone who says otherwise doesn't appreciate my constant need for validation through "hanging out." 

Some friends of mine are heading to the beach on this fine and beautiful Sunday. Guess who was not invited? Me. Why? Is it because I live 340 miles away? Is it because driving up to their beach would be an inconvenience to me, cost me money in toll and gas, and also take about 3 hours to meet up? Maybe. Point is...I feel left out. So you know what? I'm going to the beach right here which is only 20 minutes away. Take that my-so-called friends from out of town! 
Even these goddamn birds are at the beach


I'm juggling two plans right now and betting (and hoping) that one of them will fall through. You see, in this crazy world that we live in you need to have a back-up plan and sometimes a back-up plan to the back-up plan. Plan A is to go out for lunch. Plan B is to go the beach instead and then go drinking. Which one will fall through? Which one will reign the champion plan? Stay tuned for more after the sun has gone down. 

Saturday, May 3, 2014

One year later...

Has it really been a year since I spilled my heart out on the web? Yup. Sounds like me. Blogging is one of those things I take up, do it for a while, and then I drop cold turkey. A lot like working out, hobbies, being nice to people, and putting forth effort at work. 

What has changed in the last year? Well, I wish I could say a lot...actually, a lot has changed, I just can't bring myself to recall all that has changed. I am writing because I am bored and I can't find a thing to do. So writing will compensate for staying in tonight. Some things never change. Like when I go fishing for plans, hahaha, boy, do I never learn. 

So as to show some kind of activity on my account, I'll post. 

Monday, May 27, 2013

you'll never know

Submitted for the approval of The Midnight Society, I present the Tale of the Man with a Secret.

Yuuup...its true. There is a secret in our midst and only I know it. What a terrible secret it is too.  Its quite the burden to bare.  I'm just itching to share it. But I'm too chicken because here I am, hiding behind a blog, talking all cryptic.

I'll give one clue in the form of a picture.



Monday, December 5, 2011

Monday, November 28, 2011

Modern Day Horror

I hate to be that gay guy giving fashion advice. I really do. However, I find that I really should tell you people about this. This horrible offense to the eyes. Gladiator sandals.

Women who wear these atrocities should be forced to fight lions in a Coliseum-like setting. If that doesn’t do them in then they should be forced to follow some Jesus-like man around the desert for an entire year.

Point is these things are disgusting. Why on earth would you wear this? Are you trying to dress up as a Greek muse??? Like I said, I hate being THAT gay but it must be said. 

Say no to gladiator sandals.