Thursday, December 23, 2010

Here's some history in your eye!

My friend Bryan posted the following quote on facebook:

"Whenever you are confronted with an opponent. Conquer him with love." -Gandhi

I responded with:

“Maybe if Carthage had taken up that ideology, Rome wouldn't have burned it to the ground.”

Honestly, I could have referenced any historical event. So here are the runner ups for his comments.

1. That’s exactly what the Cherokee people did when confronted with American expansion. And everything turned out good, right?

2. Tell that to 1939 Poland.

3. Tell that to German Jews from the 1930s-1945.

4. That kind of thinking is what kept Troy alive well to this day.

5. Exactly what Athens and Sparta did to end the Peloponnesian Wars.

6. How do you think the US was able to outdo the Soviets during the Cold War?

7. Just what the French did during their revolution.

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Not My Barry, You Bitch!

Dear Barbara Streisand,

My Civics and Government teachers called and said you’re a total fucking bitch.

Sincerely,

A United States Citizen who paid more attention than you in 7th grade civics and 12th grade government.

That is my response to Babs’s stupid rant on Larry King the other day when she said she was disappointed in Obama. This also goes out to Gene Simmons of Kiss who said he voted for Obama out of pity and now regrets voting for him. According to people like this, Obama needs to singlehandedly fix every problem this country faces. Obama must go over the heads of Congress, the Supreme Court, and just not give a fuck about State jurisdiction to fix any and every problem.

The Executive Branch, according to these people, is the most powerful branch of government! Thomas Jefferson and your boys the anti-federalists must be having a bout of violent diarrhea in their graves! There’s this little thing called a balance of power. You know, where one branch checks the other and no one is able to be more powerful than the other. It’s done so that we don’t accidentally have a tyrant. You know, the kind of shit we bitched about in the Declaration of Independence and made it possibly through the Constitution.

So who should people’s bitching and ranting be directed to? Congress, of course! They are the ones who create and pass laws. That’s one of the many things they get to do. Yup, they are the ones in charge of passing legislation that are supposed to meet our needs or fix problems. Congress doesn’t necessarily have to follow what the president wants! Oh, is Congress not working efficiently? Guess who's in charge of their own rules ? CONGRESS. Guess who voted for the invasion of Iraq? Congress! Guess who removed the Public Option out of the Healthcare Reform bill? CONGRESS! Guess who can stall Congress from doing any of its legislative work? A Senator! It’s called filibustering! Certainly, some of you out there have seen the West Wing!? RIGHT?

Anyway, maybe the problem is with these two party systems? Or maybe a population that isn’t very educated on how its government works? Or maybe I shouldn’t watch a news report on what celebrities think of our elected President. Sigh.

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Never Give Up

Abraham Lincoln once said "If at first you don't succeed, try, try again." And that's just what John Wilkes Booth did.


Thursday, December 2, 2010

Shortly before she died

If Looks Could Kill...

I’m a sucker for light blue and green eyes. If you catch my drift! HAHAHA! But seriously...light colored eyes = instant love.

And so, this was my thought as I stood in line at Subways. That and cursing the girl in front of me for having a complicated order. Who the hell gets grossed out by lettuce touching their sandwich? Anyway…this one guy in line, who looked like he could be a total douche with his Gucci man bag, had green eyes. Not the pond scum kind of green but more like the lightly colored boogies you had as a child. They were emerald. I immediately fall in love and stare at my lover for the next 15 minutes. And then…he vanished…I was heartbroken. Then I saw this really cute guy as I was walking to class and totally got over the other guy, haha. Does that make me shallow? Maybe!

But seriously, if you think about the person you want to fall in love with, who doesn’t think about what he/she will look like!? Certainly the person I date must have some kind of personality! For Christ sakes, it’s not as if I’ll go for some brain dead bison that only looks good…maybe, okay at least once! But appearances really mean a lot. I definitely better be able to find something attractive about you. I may not always go for the JT look alike but come on!

Honestly, I’m a modest man. I’m not looking for anyone too flashy. In fact, I would prefer if the guy I’m with isn’t such a fashion aficionado. Wouldn’t want the ol’ boy outdoing me, hahaha. Also, a lot of the fashion trends rub me wrong. Point is...it can be an average guy with a great personality and I'll find the beauty in that.